Friday, April 29, 2011

There are no more Heroes

"God... What is the Deal?"
Superman Has Left the Building




Superman has renounced his American citizenship.  

In Superman 900, the "Man of Steel" stands before the U.N. and states, "Truth, Justice, and the American way.  It's just not big enough anymore."  He then renounces his American citizenship.

I have grown up reading Superman comics.  He is my favorite Superhero.  In an age where fanboys and comic geeks turned to darker fare, and an era when people denounce the Man of Steel for being a "Big Blue Boy Scout," I have always defended Superman.  We need a beacon of goodness.  We need someone who has values that are ideal and unique; someone who is willing to lay his life down for those values.



In renouncing his American Citizenship, Superman is renouncing the quintessential American values.  What are these values?  What exactly is he renouncing?  Supes, look at a coin.   


There are our values: "Liberty," "E Pluribus Unum," and "In God we Trust."  These values are unique to America.  No other country in the history of the world has lifted up these values.  Are they so bad, so awful, or so profoundly immoral (or at least amoral) that Superman must separate himself from them?

Is it Liberty?  Does Superman believe that people should not be free to live their own lives or shape their own destiny?  Does he believe that people should be able to walk down the street without fear of being snatched off the street and flung into torture camps?  Does he feel that an individual, through a combination of talent, hard work, and (yes) luck shouldn’t be able to improve his lot in life?



Perhaps it’s “E Pluribus Unum,” or “From Many One,” which Superman simply cannot stand.  Obviously, the idea that people of multiple cultures can come together to help each other build a community and to take strength from that community appalls the Man of Steel.  Wait, that doesn’t sound right.  Is he angry that America doesn’t hold up this ideal to its perfection?  I thought that’s why he chose to take on the mantle of Superman.  To be (pardon the religiosity of the expression) “light to the world.”  


Does he not realize that the value of “E Pluribus Unum” is antithetical to human nature?  Has he learned nothing by from being around human beings for so long?  Racism and Xenophobia are nothing to be proud of, and they represent the basest aspects of humanity.  However, they are aspects to be overcome and can only be overcome by holding a value such as “E Pluribus Unum” in highest, almost sacred, regard.  Then again, perhaps Boy Blue doesn’t think humanity needs to overcome base instincts.

Still, Superman could have disdain for the most controversial American value, “In God We Trust.” 


After all, Superman flies, stops trains, sees through objects, possesses freezing breath, super-sonic hearing, etc. etc. etc.  Superman is for all, intents and purposes, a god.  Yet, as Bruce Wayne noted in Superman/Batman: Public Enemies:

            In many ways, Clark is the most human of us all.  Then… he shoots fire
            from the skies and it is difficult not to think of him as a god.  And
            how fortunate we all are that it does not occur to him.

If Superman doesn’t think he’s a god then, just maybe, he believes humanity to be doing perfectly fine without God.  I mean, did not Jor-el implore Superman (regarding the human race), “They can be a great people, Kal-el, if they wish to be?”  Perhaps, Superman took this to mean they can be great on their own.  Of course Jor-el didn’t think so when he said, “They only lack the light to show the way.    For this reason, above all, their capacity for good, I have sent them you.  My only son.”   



So Superman is to be a “light” to “show the way.”  Excellent! This is what all great moral teachers do.  Confucius, Jesus, Martin Luther, Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jr., and Pope John Paul didn’t bring a “new morality” but reminded people of the morality and ethics that they had forgotten.  Philosophers that suggested a new morality either killed themselves (Nietzsche) or EVERYONE ELSE (Hitler and Karl Marx).

And where did this morality, this ethical code, come from?  God.  Of course God.  It’s the morality of God that compelled Jefferson (along with Adams and Madison, by the way…Jefferson physically wrote the Declaration of Independence probably because he had the nicest handwriting) to write, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.”


It seems to me that Superman would in fact agree with the ideas of America’s Founding Fathers, especially regarding God.  Superman, undoubtedly believes in the capacity of mankind for good (as do I, as did Jesus), but he would acknowledge that to actually do the good for which man has a capacity is a struggle.  It is something man must work for, as John Adams states in a letter written on October 11, 1798, “Greed, ambition, revenge, sexual compulsions are each able to break the strongest cords or our Constitution in the same way a whale goes through a net.  In other words, our [United States] Constitution was only for a moral and religious people.”  Surely in 70 years of constantly fighting evil forces from Lex Luthor,


to Metallo, 

to Parasite, 

Superman must have come to the same conclusion as John Adams.  The vices of mankind can destroy the most idealistic of morals, if God is not moving within the people attempting to sustain such morals.

Then again, Big Blue could just be disturbed by the tedious merging of church and state that “In God We Trust” inherently brings with it.   



Well I hope he can be comforted by Benjamin Franklin, perhaps the least religious founder of them all, who said to the chairman of the 1789 Constitutional Convention:

“I have lived, Sir, a long time, and the longer I live, the more convincing
proofs I see of this truth: That God governs in the affairs men.  And if a
sparrow cannot fall to the ground without His notice, is it probable than and
empire can rise without his aid?  We have been assured, Sir, in the sacred
writings [the Bible], that ‘except the Lord build the House, they
labor in vain that build it.’  I firmly believe this; and I also believe that without
His concurring aid we shall succeed in this political building no better than
the Builders of [the tower of] Babel.”

I mean, can Superman really be that disturbed by faith in a God that says, “Love your neighbor as yourself, and do to other as you would that others should do to you,” which is what John Adams wrote in his diary on August 14, 1796, followed by the words, “which brings good to everyone.”  This Golden Rule, as we have come to call it, is uniquely part of the Judeo/Christian value system; the value system America is founded upon.

So what, then, is Superman’s problem with the “American Way?”  I doubt he has any serious objections to any of these values.  I must conclude that he has forgotten these values.  You see, the amazing thing about the “American Way” and the reason that Superman in the 30’s and 40’s wanted to stand for the “American Way” was that it wasn’t just the best HOPE for America.  It was the best HOPE for the world.  If the world follows in America’s footsteps, valuing Liberty, from many one, and to trust in God, then it can step out of the darkness that humanity is mires itself in, and it can become “the great people that we wish to be!”


It is my sincere hope that Superman will remember that he stands for Truth, Justice, and the American Way.


Thursday, April 21, 2011

Episode One: The Spirit Troublemaker

Cocktails of Note:  The First Cocktail

In the beginning, man was tired.  He had worked a long day, and desired greatly in his heart to relax.  He wanted to sit and drink, for he was thirsty.  And if his thirst could be quenched while enabling the relaxation of his mind and body, then THAT would be good.

So, man discovered alcohol, and it was… morally ambivalent.   


Now the alcohol was created from the fruit of the vine, or the grain of the ground, or the honey of the bees, or the rice of the pad, or the agave plant, or sugar cane, or…whatever the heck ouzo is made of.  It was even distilled from wormwood.  Basically, man found that if he could get a healthy buzz off it, he would distil and drink it; and damned be the possible insanity or resulting blindness.


But what of the cocktail, that great combination of flavors that allow a man to achieve relaxation (while often failing to achieve other things… which, is hardly worth mentioning because there’s about 1,000 pills for that now) and sophistication?  When did that come about?  What was the first cocktail?  It’s a mystery like the location of the Ark of the Covenant...

the T.O.E. formula...

or why Kim Kardashian is famous.


Well, others may wonder, but this is America.  And while others may ponder, we will discover!  Or at least take credit!  So, in the world of cocktails, in the beginning, there was:



The Sazerac

2 oz. rye whiskey
1 sugar cube
5 dashes Peychaud’s bitters
Absinthe
Lemon Twist

Fill an old-fashioned/martini glass with ice and top with water.  In the 2nd glass, combine the sugar and bitters, muddle with the back of a spoon or a muddler.  Add rye and stir.  Discard water and ice.  Coat glass with absinthe.  Strain rye mixture into glass.  Rub the rim with lemon twist and garnish.

This cocktail is the official drink of New Orleans, and, according to drunken lore, is the first cocktail created on American soil.  Named for the Sazerac House, which first offered the cocktail with Sazerac-de-Forge et Fils cognac as the main ingredient.   


They used Peychaud’s bitters because they were made by the local druggist, Antoine Amedie Peychaud, as a cure all for everything from upset stomach to hiccups. 

By 1870, the primary ingredient changed to rye whiskey.   


Why Rye?  Because a grape epidemic in France killed so many grapes that cognac became rare and expensive.  Meanwhile, rye was easily grown on American soil, hence the change (in my opinion for the better) of ingredients.


By the way, Absinthe (for those of you concerned) is legal in the United States again.  It is an anise-flavored spirit derived from herbs, including the flowers and leaves of the herb Artemisia absintium, commonly referred to as "wormwood", together with green anise and sweet fennel.  It is often green in color and is nick-named “The Green Fairy.”  Despite what you may hear to the contrary, Absinthe does not cause hallucinations! 




This cocktail has a great herbal flavor that plays nicely with the sweetness of the sugar (Please do not use simple syrup because it makes the drink entirely too sweet.), and the smoothness of the Rye Whiskey.  You feel like you should be sitting in a slightly smoky (but not over-powering) tavern or bar, where everything is made of wood with deeply grooved grains.  There should be barrels of wine, beer, cognac, and whiskey stacked up on a wall, and the amber glow of soft overhead lights or candles should illuminate your half-shut eyes as some gothic soul reads Edgar Allen Poe’s poetry out loud.  


Supposedly, the Sazerac was Poe’s poison of choice.

Ideally, you want a flavor of New Orleans and the South as you drink this.


Ere go, I recommend New Orleans native Allen Toussaint's Southern Nights.  



Now, you could grab Louis Armstrong's greatest hits, but Allen Toussaint combines so many of the rich musical traditions of New Orleans; from Dixieland jazz, to Gospel, to blues, to Calypso beats, and fuses them together, that you just FEEL like you're in New Orleans.  

Above: Allen Toussaint


In 2006, Allen Toussaint collaborated with Elvis Costello on The River in Reverse, and while the blues/rock triumph that results is great, Southern Nights is the album that sounds like a Sazerac tastes.  

It starts a bit rowdy with "Last Train" (that's the absinthe streak), but it also mellows into a smooth comfortable rhythm with "What do you want the Girl to Do?" (that's the whiskey). In between you might make love with "Back in Baby's Arms" (ah, there's the sugar cube sweetener) or sway to the groovy scene of "When the Party's Over" (the bitters mixing everything up without overdoing it.)  Just check out the last track: "Cruel Way to go Down"





Great Artist.  Great Cocktail.

Thanks for drinking,

The Giant

Monday, April 11, 2011

Don't Panic...unless you're in Stavro Mueller Beta. Then Panic! OR What does "42" really answer?

Books I've Never Read (But everyone else has)


The (inaptly named) Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Trilogy (consisting of five books)



Sorry for the delay in getting this one out.


Awhile back I finally finished reading the fifth book in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series:  Mostly HarmlessMy love affair with this absurdly hilarious series started in 9th grade when my high school drama teacher, Mrs. Janet Graham (a women who's contribution to the warping of my mind and soul cannot be overstated, and for which I am truly grateful) introduced me to the BBC radio series.



I had never heard of the series before, but being a huge Red Dwarf fan (another Scifi comedy series with a large following in the Pacific Northwest), I thought "Couldn't hurt?"  Which, oddly enough, is usually what a 101 lb. Star Trek fan says when an acquaintance of his invites him to play rugby.  So I gave the radio series a try.  I knew then that I would love this series when, by the end of the first episode...


The Earth is Destroyed.  




And it's hilarious.


However, it wasn't until a few months ago that I finally picked up The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy with the intention of reading the complete trilogy, all five books:

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy




The Restaurant at the End of the Universe






Life, the Universe, and Everything






So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish






Mostly Harmless






The series starts off strong, and like most science fiction, reflects our society back to us.  The first book, especially, satirizes the mindlessness of inane, bloated bureaucracies.  This mindset is personified (wait... "alien-i-fied"?)  in the Vogons; the most wonderfully evil aliens ever to destroy earth.  Like the government they represent, they are bloated, bulbous, bureaucrats of blistering balderdash.

Think I'm stretching the metaphor?  This is a vogon.



This is a government worker.


Vogon


Congressman Barney Frank



I rest my case.



I find it fascinating that the most frightening thing to come out of the literature of the British Welfare state is the mindless bureaucrat.  From Fleming to Adams to Rowling, the contempt for the bureaucrat is a recurring theme.  I mean who inspires more anger?  Voldemort or Dolores Umbridge?


The real theme of the book is "What is the meaning of life?"  Adams basically takes his everyman hero, Arthur Dent...



(portrayed in the 2005 film by Martin Freeman, who will also be playing Tolkien's everyman hero, Bilbo Baggins in the upcoming The Hobbit films) 

... on an absurd adventure through time and space to answer the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything.




It turns out the answer is "42," which we learn from Deep Thought, the 2nd most powerful computer ever created, after he thinks about it for 7 1/2 million years.  The most powerful... I'm not gonna spoil everything.  But it is the job of the second computer to come up with the Ultimate Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything.


Pictures above: Deep Thought

(BTW, you can spot a Hitchhiker fan if they answer a question to which they do not know the answer, or one that is simply absurd, with 42.)


Naturally, this answer doesn't sit well with Arthur so he spends the next four books trying to understand life on his own, without coming to any real conclusions.  *SPOILER ALERT* Along the way Arthur learns to fly (in which you must throw yourself at the ground and miss), encounters Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged (an immortal alien dedicated to insulting everything that's ever lived... alphabetically), spends time with the two-headed President of the Galaxy Zaphod Beeblebrox (a man who's ego is so immense that when placed in the total perspective vortex [a curious device that shows a person the entire universe and your place in it] he realizes he is the most important thing ever), opens a sandwich shop, eats lunch at the end of the Universe, accidentally kills multiple incarnations of a pot of flowers, and meets Elvis.


Sound crazy?  It is.  And that's really the point.  You see, Douglas Adams is (or was) quite a committed atheist.  So when it comes to grappling with the great questions of life, which according to him are...


Why are we born?

 Anyone else think this baby is wondering the same thing?


Why do we die?


Well, look who's in charge of that one.


And why do we spend so much of the intervening time wearing digital watches?






The only answer is that there is no answer and this is all just an absurd mish-mash that we're passing through, or our way to an empty death.  And honestly, without a God, Creator, Karma, Higher Power, Divine Moral System, this is EXACTLY the conclusion that every honest, committed atheist must come to.  Hence, *SPOILER ALERT* at the end of Mostly Harmless, Adams kills off the characters we've grown to love after four books: Arthur Dent, Trillian (the only other survivor of Earth's demise) and Ford Prefect, while hanging out in the bar Stravo Mueller Beta.


Naturally, this is a rather depressing ending.  At least he's consistent.  He opens Hitchhiker's by citing a made up philosopher who wrote the theological blockbusters Where God Went Wrong, Some More of God's Greatest Mistakes, and Who is this God Person Anyway?  The end of the fourth book presents the creator's last message to creation.  That message *SPOILER ALERT*  "We apologize for the inconvenience."  This at least is a humorous way of expressing his personal beliefs while allowing the fans a bit of hope.


I'm a committed Christian (in case you haven't figured that out about me) and (shocking, I know) the atheistic worldview didn't offend me, and I often laughed, (I'm pretty sure God can take it) but if you can't stand the idea of God being mocked just remember two things: 1) God is never mocked.  He always has the last word.  2) Like all atheists (a generalization that I stand by), the god Adams wants to tear down, is the god of the kind of faith that is suitable for a child of 6, and one that no serious person-of-faith believes in anyways.  

Please do not let delicate sensibilities keep you from enjoying at least the first three of these humorous and irreverent books.  I would even recommend the fourth book, in which Arthur meets a lovely girl named Fenchurch.  Also, the books are not without good advice, like "Always know where your towel is (it is the most astonishingly useful thing in the galaxy).  Don't Panic.  Go mad once in a while.  Xenophobia sucks and might lead you to the creation of an army of universe destroying Robots that play Cricket.  Belgium is a bad word (although most of us knew that).  And always say thanks for fish.






On the subject of names:  I love a good name.  And Douglas Adams aural linguistics with the names of his characters is a true delight.  He's up there with Tolkien, Lewis, and Shakespeare for me.  I mean check out this brief lists of names:


Slartibartfast


Zephod Beeblebrox


Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz


The Ravenous BugBlatter Beast of Traal






Grunthos the Flatulent


Oolon Colluphid






Great Green Arkleseizure


Gag Halfrunt



Zarniwoop


I mean COME ON!  Lewis Carroll never came up with anything so mind-boggingly crazy.  And it's that kind of craziness that makes these books (except for Mostly Harmless) a great space trip.




Thanks for reading,


The Giant